Make A Terrible Fan Character Contest!

So hey guys! So as you hopefully know by now, we're having a fairly chillax SAGE this year. One in particularly awesome feature this year is that I'm giving away a crap load of stuff! Particularly, a lot of neato steam games! I'd especially like to invite you Retro fellows n' folks to my Make A Terrible Fan Character Contest! Details found below!

Submissions go here:
http://sonicunited.org/forums/index.php?/topic/7201-make-a-terrible-fan-character-contest-win-pc0s-stuff/

Pretty simple. Make an awful fan character. The more brutally retarded as fuck, the better. Make it as hilarious as possible, if you can beat out the other entries with some really lacking in quality submissions, you could win some of my shit! Even a copy of MMF2! (Jesus christ, that shit is normally a 100 dollars, it's absurd) Of course, feel free to take part in any of my other contests, such as Slingerland hosting rounds of Family Feud. I can't give this shit away fast enough and I'd love to give some of that shit away to YOU!

Oh and yeah, we got some fan games or some shit too or whatever. Guess this can be a SAGE thread too or whatever. Sure why not.

Edit: By the way, you may enter the terrible fan character contest up to THREE times! Just post each character separately!